I went from 3 to 44 books read in the last year and I’m not stopping now.

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What is you first memory of books? Mine is my Dad reading to me every night before bed. He was fired from his job the month before I was born and decided to go out on his own — build his own company and his family, at the same time. The early days of both take an inordinate amount of time and commitment. There were days when he would work until midnight or 1AM, only to be up at 6AM the next morning and head back into the office. In his attempt to spend time with his budding family he…

How I left my alternative upbringing to enter the modern world.

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The first time I can remember going to the doctor was at the age of 18. I needed a physical to study abroad so I went to my doctor, although I didn’t know I actually had one. I remember sitting in the “healthy” side of the waiting room, watching kids play in the corner, overlooking the constant hubbub of a paediatricians office. I was shocked at how nice and welcoming he was — a trait now I assume is expected among paediatricians. Growing up in a house of alternative medicine, I was always afraid of doctors. When I was sick…

Being content with my body starts with exploring the formative experiences that shaped my body anxiety

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Once every couple of months, I’ll spend the day avoiding work and doing research on the plethora of anxiety disorders I might have. I know I don’t have social anxiety — I love meeting new people, performing and entertaining them, and I’m a people pleaser at heart. I know I have Trichotillomania — I’ve been pulling hair out of my eyebrows, eyelids, beard, and chest since High School. But I spend a lot of time reading up on Body Dysmorphic Disorder.

I grew up fat and ugly. Ouch — melodramatic much? This was at least, what I thought growing up…

A look back at the selfies I used to take for gay dating and hookup apps.

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I’m standing in front of the bathroom mirror. Or in the Hallway. Or in my room.

I’m wearing a skin tight colored tank top, there’s hair sticking out of the top and the sides. I’m shirtless, desperately sucking my stomach in. I’m wearing short underwear that I think makes may bulge look bigger. A hookup once told me they were cute.

I’m smiling, my beard is trimmed, I’m wearing glasses. My smile is only mouth deep. My eyes show more of the story: desperation, longing, lonesome. The photo is cut off at my neck. …

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Every piece of content I see these days has one thing or another to do with coronavirus. People are stressed out and that stress leads to a sort of fixation around the object of stress, creating more stress, anxiety, tension headaches, panic, and it’s all wrapped up in a cyclical nature that leads to starting every day with dread.

So instead of fixating on the thing itself, I’m going to divulge my morning routine that keeps me sane during quarantine. …

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I don’t think I ever gave you a fighting chance. Not you you, what you were trying to do, what you were trying to teach me and all of us. I look back at the confused troubled kid of that time and want to give him a hug, a pat on the pack, a reassurance that it’s all going to be okay — some vein attempt to save myself from the struggle of the coming months and years. When I look more closely though, I realize something that wasn’t really clear to me before.

You did all those things.


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The outside has always been dirty to me. Not from dirt, bugs, other people, or any one thing — it’s just always been dirty. Since I can remember, if I took a single step outside the house my clothes were dirty. Growing up, I’d have to strip in the first room of my house and walk back to my bedroom in my underwear to put on fresh, clean clothes. Shoes were always left outside, we each had our own pair of inside slippers to wear and you had to wash your hands with hot water for at least 1 minute…

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I first became a manager by chance. My team leader had left abruptly for another job and we needed someone to fill the position, almost immediately. I’d like to say I was qualified, but I don’t really think I was. I was certainly eager, which was the thing my company liked the most. With no previous training, and very little guidance, I jumped into the position. I made a lot of mistakes; looking back at these mistakes, I recognize them time and time again in different managers I’ve had.

Blame it on a lack of experience, or training, but these…

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If I asked you to describe yourself in a single sentence, do you think you could? Maybe you would say something about your age, ethnicity, gender, where you’re from, or what you do. What about if I asked you to describe a work colleague?

Take a second and think of your workplace. Who is the first person that comes to mind? Try to describe them if you can in a single sentence (actually do it).

My guess is you described a few key traits. Maybe “confident”, or “arrogant” (those two often come together in business). Perhaps they are especially talented…

You’ve probably done it too.


I wouldn’t refer to myself as an exhibitionist. I don’t have an innate desire to send naked pictures around and I don’t get a particular thrill from the *ding* of my junk soaring across cyberspace. Yet I do send nudes and I’m not ashamed of it; many millennials and onward aren’t either and it’s not just due to an innate immaturity or lack of responsibility. Really, it goes down to a more social change; the way we see the body is changing. …

Aaron Shea

Software engineer and literature nerd. Can be found drinking coffee and thinking about Lord of the Rings.

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